When I used to train, I always adjusted my ways to the horse, I always took time to study their, temperment, adittude, and personality, before starting the training. Then I would work with the horse one on one to teach the basics, then I expected the owner to work with me to finish the training, that way you learn what needs to be done and your horse learns your style of riding. At that point I rarely every rode the horse again. I just instructed my clients on how to do what ever needed to be worked on. So if I was in your position I would sit down with the trainer and discuss what you want, and expect, and a program to get there.